Ugh

I wanted to tell you what you mean to me
but all I could think of were bedtime stories
You know
like the one about the kid
who fell under the steamroller
which turned out to be his mother
and then he became a Christmas tree.

Don't judge me
I had a weird childhood.

I sit in branded cafes surrounded by dweebs
Who the heck uses the word "dweeb" these days?
It's so 1984
I love Big Brother!

Man
There were these kids the other day
and one of them was saying how
he was on this trip to New York
and one of the kids told the teacher he was getting a handjob
from his girlfriend
(which he totally wasn't. Just so you know.)
so all the guys had to sit on one side
of the bus
and the girls on the other side
and all I could think was,

DIEDIEDIEFUCKINGDIE

True story.

I want to call but I'm afraid
Afraid of needing
of smothering
of myself.

Oh man
then the other day
I was walking down the street
and it started to rain
and it made me think of you
so I hid in a doorway
but that made me think of you too
so I ran away from my memories
and got soaked.

That's not a metaphor for anything,
I really did get wet.