Unsent

I've been debating whether or not to put this up, as I wrote it...last night? Two nights ago? I forget. Oh well. As the title of this post suggests, this is an unsent letter.

Maybe you're wondering why I haven't called you in a bit. You're probably not, but let's pretend you are for the sake of this letter.
I'm really tired of always being the one to call and always feeling ignored. I'm better than that. I deserve better than that. I think you do too. I think you're not happy where you are right now and maybe I could help, but who am I to say that to you and to tell you how to live your life.
It's not all about you, too. (note: this doesn't really make sense to me now, but hey, I wrote this at like 2 am and I'm just leaving it in for full accuracy) I think you're beautiful. I want you. I respect you. I'm a nice fucking guy and I wish you could see that and want that.
Maybe you do and you're afraid. More likely I'm too nice and you're not attracted. That's fine, but I wish you'd tell me instead of leading me on. Maybe you're not. Maybe you don't even realize you are. I don't care.
I could have loved you, I think. Maybe I still could. But I need to say goodbye right now. I hope this helps. It probably won't. Why the hell do I get so hung up on women? Am I just in love with the idea of being in love? What the fuck is wrong with me?